S2E16 with Nubia Younge - Chasing Peace, Not Paychecks

Today’s guest is the embodiment of bold moves and beautiful journeys. Nubia Younge is a dynamic entrepreneur, travel advocate, and the visionary founder of Black in Travel and Black In Tulum—the premier community for melanated travelers. After more than a decade in corporate America, Nubia made the courageous decision to walk away and rewrite the script on her own terms, choosing a life filled with purpose, freedom, and global connection.

After an unexpected layoff, and a desire for something greater, Nubia’s journey quickly evolved into something far more powerful—a movement. From living in multiple countries to creating safe, vibrant spaces for Black travelers abroad, Nubia’s journey led her to build a thriving community that celebrates Black joy, culture, and adventure in places where it’s often been overlooked.

In this episode, we talk about the power of starting over at 40, the importance of representation in travel, how Nubia is helping thousands of Black travelers feel seen, supported, and inspired and her own remarkable path to peace. Get ready for a powerful conversation about taking the leap, building something beautiful, and living life on your own terms.

Welcome to the conversation! 

To learn more about Nubia, Black in Travel & Black in Tulum, and to follow her on her social media platforms, visit https://www.nubiayounge.com

Thank you for joining us and we can't wait to welcome you back again next week! New episodes drop every Thursday and can be found wherever you find your favorite podcasts!  

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Want to learn more about our host, Eric Nicoll?  Visit:  https://ericnicoll.com

Transcript

0:05

Hello everyone. Welcome to the Just Do You Podcast. My name is Eric Nicoll, and I'm your host. If you are a first time listener, welcome to the conversation and if you're a regular, I'm honored that you've decided to join me for another episode. I. The Just Do You Podcast is centered around a network of conversations, which are meant to connect us, to inspire us, to find our own confidence, our own voice, and to live our own truth. And who knows, we might even learn a little something new that ultimately allows us to live in the sweet spot that I like to call the Just do you space of being. Each week, I have the privilege of sitting down for unscripted conversations with friends, family, colleagues, community leaders, and influencers that all share their own personal journeys. I hope that you enjoy our time together as much as I have. We are certainly going to laugh, and yes, we might even cry a little, but in the end, we are going to know that we're not alone during our life's journey. So are you ready? Great. Let's do this. Welcome to the conversation. All right, everyone. Welcome to today's episode. I'm just going to jump right in and introduce my guest. I have been waiting for this conversation for about six months, so allow me to introduce my guest today, Nubia Young. Hi Nubia. Hey, what's going on Eric? I am so happy to be here. Oh my gosh. I, as I told you before, we jumped on, I have been traveling outta the country thinking fondly of you throughout my travels, which we're going to talk about today. But I was thinking about you and this amazing life that you live and your story, and your journey about finding that just do you space of being. So thank you for taking the time and being here today. Thank you for having me. I'm going to go ahead and introduce you to our listeners and read a little bit of your bio. I, I love to do that because I think it's really empowering when you read someone's bio and then you see their reaction to who they are.'cause I don't think a lot of times we own truly who we are. We've written the copy, it's up on some website that we rarely look at, and we go through our day. And so I'm always taken back by the responses and the facial expressions of the people that I read their bio. So I'm going to just introduce you for a moment and then we'll get started. So for our listeners Nubia is the founder and CEO of Black in Travel and Black in Tulum. We met last year at an industry event in Tulum, Mexico, where she spoke on a panel with an amazing and extraordinary woman who was also a guest on this podcast. And I was really taken back by the conversation that we had. But Newbie is a mom. She's a global traveler. She's an entrepreneur who's dedicated to helping women rewrite their stories and to reclaim their power and to boldly step into what she calls their more. And we're going to talk a lot about that in today's conversation. She's built a life that she says is worth living, which I think we all need to do, and it's filled with unforgettable adventures, meaningful connections, and really bold choices. And her journey proves that freedom and purpose are always possible. Yet I know the journey as a single mom and navigating your life in raising your. Two children has not been an easy one. And so we're going to talk about that today. So again, welcome to the conversation. It's an honor to have you here and I'm going to take you back a little bit. Nubia. I'd like to go back and find out a little bit more about the young Nubia. Where were you born? What was your family? Dy dynamics like, only child siblings. What that young Nubia was like.'cause I really believe that sets the tone for our future. And I'm curious to learn a little bit more about you from that perspective. Wow. So that's a story within itself. But I am the only child and I was raised by my mother and my grandmother my father was an absentee dad. He was ex-military and got caught in that opioid situation, with the military overseas. So he was battling his own addictions through my young adulthood and young life. And, my mother and I honestly don't have the best relationship. I've always felt different from the family and from her. She was that mother that got a job straight outta high school, 18. She actually retired from the same company. Wow. So growing up here I am, working this odd end job or that job. And, and I don't know if for her, it was just a disappointment, but it was just like, why don't you get a job and just, that kind of thing. And I'm just like, because I don't like it, I wanna do something that makes me happy or I wanna do something where I feel seen, growing up in Massachusetts, Boston, it's a commonwealth state. Racism still exists, and I felt I just didn't belong. And then on top of that, I was getting depressed in the winters and I couldn't figure out for what was happening. And I got diagnosed manic depressive in 2000 with SAD, which is like the winter blues, so gray skies, all of that stuff kept hovering over me. So I left Boston and moved to Virginia and that opened up a lot more because I got to see people who were working for the government, people of color who had these jobs that were making six figures. You know what I'm saying? And I didn't, I wasn't raised like that, so I didn't, wasn't sure. Everybody that I knew was really just middle class, but moving to DC I seen upper class black folks and I was just like, oh my gosh. I love this. And I was just, I can I put it, I put my kids in IB schools. I was just, oh my gosh. Living in the DDMV, as we call it, dc Maryland, Virginia. You're just exposed to so much. And no matter what time of the day, what day of the week, you seen young black professionals, whether they were in the restaurants, whether they were at, some speakeasy or some jazz bot or art thing. And I loved it and I just immersed myself in that culture. And that's where actually I found travel. Traveling for me at that time as a single mom was really about going to New York, going to Miami, maybe Jamaica, but I didn't have a passport until I turned 32. Oh wow. Yeah. Wow. Go back for a second.'cause you said something that has me thinking. So when you were. Young and not really seeing yourself represented what was that like? What were the feelings and the thoughts that you had as young Nubia? I think a lot of times it was sadness because you really can't pinpoint, you didn't have the words right? Sure. And not only am I a dark-skinned black woman, I'm also a dark-skinned black queer woman. You understand what I'm saying? So there were so many levels to things that I just didn't see. That looked like me. Sounded like me, or even the mindset of myself. It's just like I knew there was more out there. I just didn't know how to attain it. I knew that this couldn't be my life. Like this can't be boston, it was very just it, and I was just like, it cannot be my life. I got something different. So moving to Virginia opened up those doors because I started to see others and it wasn't just black people, it was just people of color in general. I'm obviously not of that same conversation. I grew up in a very, cisgendered white, upper middle class neighborhood where we didn't have a lot of diversity. And my mother, a teacher made a point to get me down to downtown LA get me into the parts of Los Angeles where I could see that there was diversity. I could see that there was other, nationalities and other backgrounds and I really praise her for that because she knew that we were very. Lucky to live the life that we had and to be, raised by a single mom and an amazing grandmother, two of them and grandfather. But it was a very sheltered life. And conversely, although there was, I guess what we're now calling privilege, there was this strange sense inside of me that there had to have been more, there had to have been other experiences living in this little walled, gated community. And so I think that first time that you see representation of other communities, of other cultures, it really is eye-opening. And it, for some almost ignites this desire To find more. To see more. Yeah. And so when you end up in this place where you're seeing professionals and you're seeing people that are out living and being in there more, as you use the phrase, it's gotta be empowering, but also maybe a question of, am I worthy? Am I going to be able to achieve that? Am I able to, it makes me emotional. Take what? I believe is my God-given birthright and to go for those things. So that's a super powerful transition. And so what an opportunity, and I say the universe working in your favor because you were given an opportunity and you certainly did take it. The thing about it is, and I want to pinpoint something that I failed to mention when I lived in Massachusetts and my family lived in Roxbury, like the city, and I did not see myself wanting to live in the city. And just seeing the grit, the grind the, all the things. And I was just like this. I always wanted to live a soft life. One of, one of of what some people or the black culture would think was opulent, right? Because that wasn't a part of their story. And I lived, I ended up, I was on section eight, let's just start there. Section eight. But instead of doing public housing and all of those things, I got a house, like at a house in a predominantly Jewish neighborhood, in Newton, Massachusetts. The only black woman on the block. I loved my Jewish neighbors. They would come over and eat things like collard greens and fried chicken, and they would just fall in love and they loved my kids, and I would take my kids apple picking and we would make homemade applesauce. Those are the things that you don't see black families doing. You know what I mean? I was already putting myself in a position to give myself and my children different experiences from the jump. So what is it, in your opinion, that has other black families not experiencing that? What is it? A conversation? I truly believe back then in the nineties, it was, do will we feel like we belong? Number one, right? Because when I did these things, we were probably the only people of color in those places. I just didn't let that deter me from going. You know what I'm saying? And I'm not saying that all black families don't go out and do things, but the ones that I've seen were in the city and they stayed in those four blocks, it seemed. You know what I mean? And that's where they felt comfortable. Yeah. Or maybe that's where they felt like they could only be, but for me, yeah. I was like, I was that rebel that was like, oh no, this can't, I gotta go forget blocks. I'm in a whole nother town, so I did that from the beginning, and that's what I meant about, I didn't feel like I belonged. I still don't feel like I belong in a lot of places. I have traveled the world on this pursuit of belonging and happiness, and it wasn't until about 45, I'm 47 in this present moment, and at 45 I'm going through therapy. I'm doing all the things. I have traveled 50 countries, I've been lived on four continents. I've done all of these things. And it wasn't until then that I realized this pursuit that I've been on was myself. I needed to find the happiness and that belonging within me. Nothing that I could do or went to, or it was not external, so that's when I started on my pursuit to self love. Because a friend asked me a question and she was like, do you love yourself? And I, and the first thing I'm like, what? Absolutely. You know what I mean? But then when I sat with that question and she said, I'm not talking about superficially like getting your hair nails done and going out and taking trips and doing all this stuff, she goes, honestly, loving yourself. Like loving the skin you're in, loving, you know who you are innately. And I had to sit with that and I sat with that and I continue to sit with that. And I have to find the things that I want externally within myself first. Because it won't be beneficial.'cause I have traveled the world. But to be honest with you, a lot of it is the blur. It is a blur at this point. I don't think we ever get to a point in our lives, and some may disagree with me and probably failed this on my coaching exam, but I don't think we ever get to a point where we're like, this is it. I love myself wholeheartedly. We are constantly and tirelessly unpacking and unpacking, and then we get something else that gets put in our suitcase and we gotta look at that and unpack it. I was unpacking stuff last week as I was walking on the beach by myself one morning at five 30 in the morning on this glorious, gorgeous morning, unreal. And I'm unpacking stuff from when I was 12 and I thought, this is just the stuff that comes up in our daily lives, in the entrepreneurial world, we are constantly challenged at improvement, getting better, bettering ourselves, bettering our work, and we have to look at ourselves because we're it, we don't rely on a company and executives and support staff for the most part, we are the ones that have to carry that. And so I find that being an entrepreneur almost challenges us even more to continually forge that path of self-care or self-love. Because at the end of the day, you're the one that's responsible. So in the bad times, I heap that on me oh, maybe it's me, maybe it's me, maybe it's me. So I'm curious, so was this around 2017 that you mentioned in your biography that change happened when this conversation was happening? Or was that earlier? I. No. So in 2016 I was working as an event planner, an assistant to the VP of National Security for an aerospace company. And I was doing events all over for these generals and, ex-military, clients like Boeing and Northrop Grumman. And so I'm just exposed to this whole different world, right? And I'm loving it. And I ended up going back to school.'cause I didn't finish college because I had my children young. So I went to school at 32 and at this point I was 36, maybe 37. And so I went to school for hospitality management events. I just loved hospitality. I knew this is. My lane, right? And I just knew that this job was going to be it for me. I was like, this is the place that I wanna be at. Guess what? They laid me off. And when they laid me off it was January, 2017, and I was like, what the hell? No, it was January, 2016 when I got laid off. And I was like, what the heck? You know what I mean? I've been putting in work here for five years. I'm, like I just knew this was it for me. And I got so upset and I said to myself, I'm not doing this anymore. I'm not sitting in front of anybody. And trying to prove my worth with my resume to say, hire me and pay me equally and fairly. Because I was, the reality of the situation was I got laid off, but the girl who came in before right after me was straight outta college. Her father knew the, one of the people and she became a manager in the same space that I've been working in for five years, working my way up and went back to school for you hear me? I do. That really infuriated me and I believe that was when the push for, that's it. I did something very uncon, unconventional to a lot of people. I went through my 401k and withdrew all the money, which was horrible at the time because you get taxed like 35% on your own money. But I took that money out. I took my savings. I had worked up, in that job I worked on my credit, I worked on savings. I was doing so much. I was doing what people see as the American dream in a sense. You know what I mean? All the things and, oh, yeah. And that's when I decided to downsize. My oldest was going off to college. I sent her off and then I looked at my youngest and he was in high school. He probably had about a year left. And I just said I'm tired. I'm tired. I was like, I wanna leave, I was like, do you wanna come with me or no? And he was like I'm still in school. And I was like I picked up the phone, called his father and said, it's your turn tag. You're it. I've been doing this. I. All my young adult, like I had my first at 18 years old and she's now going off to college. I did my job. Like I, I can't stay here another year waiting. You know how most people go, oh, wait till the kids are this age or that age? No I had to do it for me'cause I felt like I was going to suffocate if I stayed. And so I downsized from our townhouse and I sent my son, packed him up, sent him to go live with his dad, and I downsized to a one bedroom apartment. And yeah, I started to sell things. I started to get rid of things. I had no rhyme or reason. I was just like, I can't do this no more. That's pretty much it. I was like, I can't do this no more. Something's gotta give. And I just started doing it. I didn't have any. Reference. There was no one that looked like me that I knew, that lived abroad or, packed up their things and left. I did not know anyone, but it wasn't until I went to a psychic my first time. Right? And I, me too. I was that skeptic. I was always skeptic of psychics. But I had a mutual acquaintance of mine, a friend of mine who gave me a referral to a psychic. And then I was like, okay, I hear her da, and then I'm getting my haircut. And I asked my barber, I was like, have you ever been to a psychic? And she was like, yeah, I go to this lady every year. Come to find out it was the same psychic. Oh. Now I do believe in signs. Yes. So I took that as a sign and I went to the psychic and I told her like, I need to know what my life is going to be like. Yeah. And she gave me this beautiful oracle reading 60 minutes long. And when I tell you, Eric, everything that she had said is coming to fruition or has come to fruition, she was like, I see you traveling. She was like, I can't see a geographical area. She said, but you don't belong here. You're not going to thrive here. She was like, you need to be out in the world and the world will know your name. And I'm being egotistical at the time. I'm like, oh, so you're telling me I'm like a Oprah. She was like, Hey, however you look at it, but you are going to leave a legacy that will live on well past. Your death. And then she said, I'm going to work with kids. She said, I'm going to, get married. Which I was engaged but didn't fully get married, but that was on me. She said a lot of things. She said, I'll have a book and I'll have all these things. And then I was like, you know what? It's written, and I left. But the thing about it is when I left, I started sharing my story. I started sharing my story on my Facebook, just taking videos, talking about it, all of those things. And then a friend said, have you ever thought about podcasting? And I was like, what's that? She sent me a couple of links to podcasts. I was like, oh, I love talking. I love, the, and so I started chronicles abroad with a friend of mine and she was also 38. Single mom, she went to Thailand and, but she lived in the south and I decided to go to Thailand, but moved to the north and we started the podcast together, just sharing our stories. Guess what? We podcasted for two years we got, traveling Leisure put us as one of the top 10 travel podcasts. Wow. We were, occurred in over a hundred countries around the world. We had interviews lined up for, so long, and it just went haywire. And it was, at that time, I didn't know how to monetize a podcast or anything like that, but that's how I started to grow my community. And from the podcast, that's where the notoriety started coming in and I started building, community in Thailand and we would do, every Sunday we did dinners for people of color who wanted to come visit Thailand or for the people who were living in Thailand. And that was beautiful and each person would host, it was a rotation and they still do it to this day. Somebody posted a picture and it was like, we're in Thailand and we went to Sunday dinner and I commented and I said, it is so beautiful to see that you guys are still doing this. After seven years of our first one. And she was like, the first one. I was like, I'm one of the originators of the first one. It's nice to see those things continuing on. It also shows the power in community and you talk a lot about that in your bio and in your social media. That community is so important and we really. Dismantled community during the pandemic and various other states of affairs in our country here in the US over that time. But we dismantled community. We just obliterated communication and connection and community. That's my opinion. But I really believe that in my heart and all we are at the core is our journey and our stories. And the reason I started this podcast was because I, had gone through a horrific divorce, which of course I just talked about publicly for the first time on a podcast which airs in a couple weeks. That should be fun. But, I found myself living in a new town. Unhappy and sad and distraught pandemic hit. That even closed me in further. And I am a good talker. I love people. I love to connect. I love to tell stories, hear stories. And we just didn't have that. And it took me two years to get this podcast launched. I procrastinated. No one's going to listen. There isn't a community out there that's going to, to this is going to resonate with. And my friend, who's my mentor and PO fellow podcaster said, you just gotta record the first one. And like you in doing that first one, here we are two seasons later hoping to get to seven, but two seasons later. And the community that we've created there has been life-changing experiences within those conversations. And why I share that and what I think is so important is that we are all. On this earth to be of service to others. And our stories are sometimes that service, because someone sitting, listening to you, see, I told you I was going to cry, listening to you tell your story is going to potentially be sitting at home or driving in their car on their way to a job they don't like. Or feeling lost or feeling unconnected and not knowing how to make that next step. And hearing you say, I started to downsize. I started to sell my things. I knew I couldn't stay here anymore. I didn't know what was next for me. And here's what we started and here's why I am now. And the thing that's important to remember is that even though you found that courage and you found that tenacity and that more I'm not going to forget that it. Still is challenging. We were sharing about that before we hit record. It doesn't mean that your life is going to be blissfully easy, but what it means is that you're going to be living a life that has purpose living a life that has meaning. And when you do that, even giving up everything that you gave up and selling everything that you sold, you find this, what I call just do you space of being. And so the fact that you're out there doing this now and sharing it with others, and the fact that it took off so exponentially and with such velocity within the black community is really astounding. So I wanna talk a little bit about that if we can. So tell me about the start of this black in travel. I'm serious. I'm super curious because, and here's why. We talk about representation and we talk about, I. Seeing yourself in other places. And I'm consistently amazed. We sat in this amazing event together in Tulum, Mexico where we met I shared this with Zoe, and here are these extraordinary gifted, talented black women sitting on stage sharing these amazing stories and keynote speech to a room full of people that I wasn't quite sure it was actually resonating with them what it that you were talking about. And I looked around the room and I thought, with all due respect, this is a room of cisgendered white, mostly women. And yet the story was so palpable and powerful. And so I wonder if I could just go there for a second. Did you see that on the other side as well? And what was that like for you? To be honest with you, I love it. I love it when the room isn't all black. Because I want people like yourself and Exactly. To know that we exist, and that we're out there and that, and to be honest with you, that particular event after the talk, so many people approached. Wow, that's amazing. I didn't know, or that's how can we assist in any way? So you, you create allies, you create relationships and even though the representation is about people of color, women of color I am not opposed to. Opening that up for everyone to, to know and to assist wherever they can to get our voices out there, yeah. It was an amazing event and I don't mean to share that. It wasn't, I think the point was is that, and I said this to you that afternoon when I approached you, is that may not have hit them then in that moment, but I guarantee you they went home and it hit them somewhere down the road, not Oh, they hit a lot of them in that moment. Yeah. That's what I loved about it. It was like, yeah. And exactly. And in that moment also too, I think it shifted the conversation of our industry and because that's then going to ripple out and that's the power of that storytelling and the fact that there are organizations like Black and Travel and Black and Tulum Side note, digression. Sorry, I digress. Go back to what had you, then give me the chronological spot of you being in the US. What happened next? Okay, so 2017 I had my ticket and I went to Thailand. And I went to Chang, my Thailand. And when I tell you from the moment I got off of that flight to my hostel,'cause I decided since, so let me just be very clear, when I did my research right, Uhhuh, I watched so many YouTube videos. I Googled as much as I could. I could not, and I repeat, could not find people that looked like me. Everything was young, white millennials coming from Australia, coming from here, there any otherwhere, just getting outta university backpacking Southeast Asia, talking about how you can live on$5 a day. And I was just like. If they can do it I can live off of more than that, I just was just like, these are kids doing it, right? I went and I decided to rent a hostel for a month. It was$500, and I was like, sold. I walked up to the hostel after getting dropped off by the tuk, and there were two black women sitting in front of the hostel, hi, where are you guys from? They're like, oh, DC what? Okay. And then the next day another black woman walks up with a backpack and she gets a room and I'm like, hi. And come to find out, she was a woman that another associate told me about that was traveling Southeast Asia, and she just happened to come to Chang Mai. So I was already getting introduced. Immediately to, to women of color. And I was just like, but what? How? That's how I was like, stuck. I was like, but where have you guys been? I've been researching you guys. Once I got to Thailand and I started the podcast, I started using them as the people that I was interviewing to share the stories and using my own story. Then from 2017 to 2018, going into 2019, I was in Asia just traveling and enjoying my space. And every time I seen a person of color across the street or anywhere, I was just like, hi. I was so excited, right? Hi, can we exchange information? How long you've been abroad? Just a gathering. My, my friend used to tell me, she was like, you like to collect black folks? I was like, Hey, I know what it felt like to not be or feel like I was seen. I want them to know that I see you. Even if I don't speak, I'm going to give you a head nod. I'm going to give you eye contact, I'm going to give you a smile. You understand what I'm saying? It doesn't, that resonates with people no matter what color you are. Feeling seen is just a beautiful feeling. And I'm good with a smile. It's free. A hello, it's free. None of that stuff cost me anything, so I was going through that journey and then I was like, I wanna try other places. So I moved to Columbia, south America. Wow. And I was, I was hit with a lot of microaggressions and a lot of, colorism because I lived in Meine at the time and I. When people see me, they automatically thought I was Afro Colombian and most Afro Colombians are from Choco or Cali. And the way people in Meine looks at them looks different. You understand what I'm trying to say? I do. I do. So I was like, this is not it. I didn't feel, especially coming from a place like Thailand, that's very Buddhist, very land of smiles, I was like, these are my cousins. Because in the mountain regions of Thailand, these Thai people had nose that spread. They had darker complexion. They were, they just looked like we were derivatives of each other somehow, some way. So being in Columbia and being in Meine, I was like, oh, I don't like this. And so I only stayed about three, four months. I went to Germany to go visit a friend for a month, enjoyed it. But again, it wasn't my place. This is that finding the belonging, right? So then I left and I decided to come to Mexico, and Mexico was not on my list. Because it's North America and I wanted to be what I call international abroad, like way far. But I was dating somebody in Virginia and they wanted to try their hand at living abroad. So I said let's do Mexico. It was closer. You won't be too far from family and friends. And they chickened out four days before we was supposed to leave. Oh. Oh. And I landed in Mexico City, June of 2019. So I am coming up on six years, June. I landed in Mexico City. I was supposed to only stay here 10 days and then I was going to go back to Asia. I got here Eric, and fell in love with this city. It was vibrant. It was, it had it everything. It, the food you would, I would take the metro and the metros were like museums. I was like looking at so much cultural things going on and everything was innately Mexican. So I'm just like, I'm loving this. I'm loving it, I'm loving it. You walk out of the metro, people are dancing, PTA and salsa and drums and people with guitar. It was music everywhere. So I extended my stay. What I did know about Mexico City is that there we had pretty much three seasons. You get what I'm saying? Spring, summer, and. Fall for the most part. But fall feels like winter when there's no, no heated, the homes are not central heated, there's no central ac It's really just concrete. So I'm going to sleep with socks on. I got on sweatshirts and I'm remind you, I lived in these places where I didn't have to, so I didn't, I wasn't prepared. So I ended up going to actually a couple of friends came and we traveled. We went to Guatemala, we went to Porto Escondido, we went to Oaxaca City, Chiapas. We just traveled Mexico and then we came to Playdo Carmen, and that's where I landed in December of 2019. You hear me? I hear you. Uhhuh. Uhhuh. So I'm enjoying the beach and doing all the things and. Long and behold, I had a flight, March 25th, 2020 was my flight to go to Singapore. Wow. Wow. Wow. That flight kept getting delayed, canceled, next thing you know, shut down April 1st. Done. I was quarantined in Playdo Carmen, and I was just like, okay so what I did was I made the best out of the situation. I had this beautiful condo'cause everything was dirt cheap. A lot of Canadians own properties in play. Dale, Carmen and Canada Prime Minister was like, either bring your butt back to Canada or you miss out on all the benefits. So Canadians were fleeing back to Canada. Oh, wow. And they were renting their properties for a little to nothing. Like I had a two bedroom beautiful condo with an indoor outdoor space, rooftop pool, everything for$800 a month or$750 a month In Playa? Yes. Wow. During the pandemic chef's kitchen. So I put that kitchen to work. I started cooking and I started taking photos of my my food and people would ask me for the recipe. So I created a digital cookbook called Newbies Nibbles. I love you. It's so much, you rock my world opportunity in everything that you do. And I was learning that. And then, every, there was all these places that were giving free courses, free exercise thing. I joined everything that I could for free Peloton, I got all these I just taught myself and I was sharing those resources on social media. Hey, if you're interested in marketing, they're giving marketing certifications with Google, garage, or they're doing this, they're doing that. And I was just sharing resources and people were loving it, and I was just building a better community. That literally was looking to me to be like, what else is going on? Nubia? What's going on? Yeah. What's going on? Yeah. I, before you continue this I wanna point something out because it's just literally ringing in my ear. So I want our listeners to understand, you're probably sitting here listening, saying, oh, I could never do that. Or I wouldn't have that kind of luck even though you did what you did. I believe there was an intentionality in your quest. Even if it was as broad as, I gotta get outta here. I can't do this anymore. I am looking for something better. I'm looking for X, Y, and Z in my life. I'm looking for that more. Sets the intentionality for the universe to listen to you. And what the universe did, in my opinion, is brought you all of those experiences. It brought you those two black women sitting in front of the hostel, right? It did. And again, my opinion and what that did was give you the signal or the sign that said, okay, this is what's meant to be. You're in Chang, you said Chang Mai, right? You're in Chang Mai, which was gorgeous and beautiful and I didn't wanna leave Chang Mai, and this is where it starts. So intentionality is really important when you are searching and wanting to step into that more that I think you talk about. But that's with everything you do in life. But I don't think we know that though. I think we're designed or destined for a particular life, or it is the way that it is because that's the way that it is. I think that's bs. I call BS on that all the time. Yeah. I say we pivot year to year. All the time. All the time. All the time. You have to. And where people get stuck. I've seen this with family and I've seen it with friends. My dad in particular smart guy, PhD, two of them stuck, never pivoted. And he lived a life of regret. And he died frustrated and angry that he didn't do the things that he wanted to do, even though he knew that he had the opportunity and the clearance to do it. And when that happened, and when I heard that story, I promised myself, and I'm guilty of it, I promised myself I was never going to get in that spot. So your intentionality and the pivot is what I think people fear the most because we get comfortable in our circumstances. Oh, absolutely. We don't know what to do because we try to control the outcome. You have to let go of controlling the outcome. You understand what I'm saying? I do. And remind you everything that I'm telling you. Yes, it all happened, but I did have many of nights where I cried. I had many of times when I questioned did I do the right thing? You know what I'm saying? Because that's innately who we are as humans. We got to try to figure it out. Remember when I told you that I was told by the psychic that I would be working with kids? At that point I thought she was calling. I was like, bs, that's some, I'm IF them kids. No, I'm not working with kids. Being in Thailand, I worked, no, I didn't work for the first year. I didn't have to because I took my 401k out. I had my savings, but yet I'm looking at my bank account. Okay, something gotta give. Guess what I ended up doing? Teaching English online to Chinese students? It's not something that I wanted to do, but guess what? I was the best at it. Hi, I'm Teacher Nubia. You know what I'm saying? I still did the best that I could. I quit that job June of 2020 because I said, this isn't what I wanna do. I did it because I had to. I had to make some money, but I'm going to do something different. I don't know what it's going to be. I started cooking. I thought AB about. I thought about that. I thought about different things. Guess what? July of 2020, I decided to host a brunch. On the beaches of Tulum. Just because. Mexico was still allowing us to move around a little bit, and I heard about this place in Tulum. I wanted to go check it out. I went and I seen sprinkles of people of color and I also knew a couple of influencer friends that lived in Cancun apply it. So I was just like, you know what? Let's just have an event. Because like you said, what we were missing was connection. That event brought 25 people of color from Merida, which is four hours away. They drove from Merida. Wow. Cancun play Elk, Harmon and Tulum 25. And that's where Black and Tulum was born. What was that like? So was that the place you sent me to when we were there? I think you mentioned it and we did the walk that day and I think we went there. It's. Gorgeous and fun and beaut. Yes. I love Tulum. I fell in love with Tulum that not necessarily where we were staying. That was beautiful. But it wasn't until we walked into Tulum and we went to that boutique hotel that you shared with us. I was like, oh, this is me. This is my spot. This is one of my vendors that wasn't there when I started, but yeah. Yeah. So what was that like when you walked in and saw those 25 people that some had driven four hours? I want to know the feeling because here it was beautiful, right? It was just beautiful. I, just yesterday I hung out with six of my friends and we just had a great time and I literally text them and I said, I had such a great time yesterday, guys. Thank you. Like connection to me and just being able to, there was no dj, there was no club. We were just having brunch hanging. We we were breaking bread on the beaches of Tulum, the level of gratitude. I cried. Almost every single Black and Tulum event for two years straight. Because I, I bet I just sat back and was like, wow, now I'm getting emotional again. Because when I think about it, like I'm going through my own ebbs and flows right now in business, and I'm talking to my accountants and I'm like, something gotta give and this is my next pivot. And because when you're uncomfortable, that's when you challenge the most. And travel is changing to loom for a long time, or Mexico for almost three years was the only place that people could travel to. So you gotta imagine how many people were coming to my events. Yeah. I'm not getting those same numbers this year, five years in. My accountant said, Nubia, you are okay. You're not in the red. There is money in the bank. People are still doing, it's just now time. You might wanna start pivoting and change up a little couple of things. I had to sit down with the gratitude of being able to sustain a business for five years straight to pay my staff to live this soft life that I live. I had to stop thinking to myself that something was wrong. I did everything that I could and I sustained five freaking years. That is amazing. So I'm giving myself now, right? The praise. I don't need. And the grace and the grace. And the grace. But I had to sit with that, and now I'm just sitting with, okay, now what's next? Black and travel is the expansion to Black and Tulum. But I want it to look a certain way. I want it to breathe a certain way. I want it to be wrapped around wellness, wrapped around your, more wrapped around resources. These are not things that are going to make me a millionaire. These are things that I just want people to know that is possible. You have a community out here of, I specifically speak to millennial and Gen X women of color for the most part because that's what I relate to, but I also bring resources of others, 60 plus others that are in the Gen Z community. Others that are, you know what I'm saying Muslim, or just different, just there's layers on top of layers. On top of layers.'cause I'm only one individual. You know what I'm saying? I do. So now like I'm really getting involved with I-G-L-T-A, the International Gay Lesbian Travel Association. Yeah. And really getting involved with, other organizations in Mexico, AI, Mexico. I want to work with other organizations. I've been bootstrapping my business for five years. It is time to do more collaborations, more centered work around how can we reach as many women of color, gay, lesbian, straight, doesn't matter what you identify as. But that's where I'm at now, is the expansion. It's, NBIE, it's from the outsider's perspective, listening to you, and knowing, you're obviously living in Mexico. I'm here in the States now more than ever. We need community. Absolutely. And. We need community outside of our own country. Like we need to know that there are, that we're seen and that we're heard because we see and hear you. We see and hear others, right? And so what I think is so pivotal for you right now is the community's there. They just have to find you. And you have to find that space for them to find you. And that's the part that excites me about you. I have no doubt you're going to create magic. You've been creating magic since 2016. There is something about your energy, for lack of a better term, your passion and your commitment that is so intoxicating. I didn't stop think, I think I talked about you for about three solid weeks after I left Tulum, because I'll be honest, part of me was like, I'll take whatever she's taking because that to me is. The life that I wanna live. I got myself and I've had a very amazing career. I launched my company out of nothing as an event person like you. So we share a lot of that in common. I was working for someone else, I was not happy in my job. I was doing something that I loved but not enjoyed and didn't bring fulfillment. And I was making this person a lot of money and she was driving around in a Jaguar and I was driving around in a Honda and I was doing all the work. And a friend of mine who was in Canada was dating him at the time and he said, we need to get you outta there. You need to start your own company. And they basically handed me a check to start my company because they believed in me. And they said, you have a year to pay it back, no interest. And little did I know that six months in, they were going to hand me a project that would launch my career and launched my company. So I paid them back within six months, a hundred percent. And my company was launched and I had this brilliant career. I was given opportunities that I. Dreamed of intentionality. My goal was to produce an event for the Oscars. Two years in, I was doing Oscars and Golden Globes and SAG awards and Right. I went to Europe, I went to Africa, I went all of these places. I was doing galas, I was doing fundraiser. I was doing all of the things that I had only dreamed about doing. And it came to a point, if you'll remember, probably like 2008, right? Economic downturn. After getting through nine 11, all of those things that we had to muster, we had to gain our courage, we had to work through. Yet we, all, those of us who had that kind of tenacity, that entrepreneurial spirit, were able to push through. And then it wasn't until 2012 when things started to change and I realized that although I loved what I did, and I've had an amazing career, I was standing on an event site one day and I. My client said something that kind of threw me off my game. And I was walking back to my room. I was at one of the most luxurious hotels in the world and I was, I went to my room and I just burst into tears and I said, is this how I'm going out? Is this my legacy? No one cares what I do. I'm not having that lasting impact. I am always in a space where I put my heart and soul into something and planning something for a year, and in 24 hours after the event, it's reduced to a pile of sawdust and cut zip ties on the floor. And I needed that tangible touch. I needed something that created that memory for me. And interestingly enough, when I. Used my psychic. You and I share so much in common. We didn't talk about, and she shared about my next chapter. I said, you are smoking something that I don't wanna know.'cause that is just not, how is that going to happen? How am I going to have this life? And like you these things started to happen. And I realized very quickly that the more that I was looking for was that sense of legacy. What was that going to be? And so when I came across you in Tulum, it was right at the time where I was like, something's gotta change. Something's gotta give. I need more. I need to be a part of a team that celebrates each other. But I was, I was. In a spot where I realized that I wanted to be part of a team that made a difference. And so things started to open up. Companies approached me, Hey, will you freelance for us? I've got these blocks of time. I need someone, will you help us? And I said, sure, why not? I'll take that opportunity. And what's happened through that transition is I found that community of a company that celebrates its employees and celebrates its team and does events. I got hugged last Saturday as 35 people disembarked from this beautiful resort. It was my white lotus moment waving to the guests as they boarded the boat. Every single one of them, men, women, hugged me and said, thank you for being a part of that experience. And I realized it's making me get emotional. As that last boat pulled out, I realized I said this is what it's all about. Because we created an opportunity for them to experience their own happiness and their own joy. And in doing right, and in doing so. You get your life out of that. And so I realized, right? I came home and I went, wow. And then I couldn't wait for this podcast episode. I share all that because life is going to throw you opportunities and circumstances. And if we define ourselves by those circumstances, we're not living our true calling. And so to hear, sit with it, you sat with it. Yes. And it resonated. That's when you know that you're on the right path. That's when you so talk. Yeah. So talk about that for a second. So in sitting with that, what showed up for you? Like how with you sitting with that, what showed up? Same thing. Like you, I was getting people crying on my shoulders like. Thank you. I didn't get my passport until I heard about black and Tulum. Yeah. I heard so many horrible stories about Mexico and never thought about traveling here until I've seen that there is actual black people in a community in Mexico. You see what I'm saying? They started seeing themselves in me in, in my in my community. I was getting people who reached out and was like, I can't do it no more. I wanna get out of America. I'm a dj, I'm a this, and I said come on down. Let's try. I have had DJs who moved from the states to Mexico and still work for me. Y'all know how to do your DJs in Mexico. I'm telling you, I mean, you do it differently than we do it here. You there's a vibe to it. That's very much like I was in Portugal and every great bar that we went to in restaurant had a DJ spinning the best lounge, music, everything. Yeah. It changes everything. The food tastes better, the people look better. It's just fantastic. So y'all do it right? Is I was getting I remember a taxi driver one time had pulled up on me and was like, Nubia. And I was like, yeah. He was like, oh my gosh. He was like, I'm Daniel, and he was like, can I give you a hug? And I was like, why? And I was like, sure. And he's no, I just want you to know you changed my life. Black and Tulum gives me so much business. So it wasn't just the clientele, it was the staff. It was the vendors, it was the community. I, on my anniversary last year, four year anniversary, we allow these Mayan performers to come into our establishment. The guy, the head of the performance. He comes up to me, tears, Nubia. I just wanna say thank you for allowing us to show your people our culture. Thank you for opening the doors for me and my people to come into your place. You understand what I'm saying? That's where I know that what I created is so much more than just an event. It has saved lives. It has, it has made other people's lives that much better. You get what I'm saying? It really did change the course of Tulum in a way, not in a negative sense. People look at it as a negative because they're like, oh, mass tourism, that has nothing to do with me. That's the government. You know what I mean? If you're just allowing people to pour into a place it's going to, it is. There's going to be things that happen, and honestly, I sit with that too. As somebody who loves travel, tourism and events, I don't like mass tourism and how it affects a community. So now with black and travel, my goal is sustainability. My goal is wellness. My goal is how can we support, like I'm really now more on the advocacy side in a sense. You get what I'm saying? Yes. I tell my staff all the time. I'm like, I'm glad that people are having a good time. They're drinking, they're dancing, they're doing all those things, but we are more than just an event. And we always have been. People celebrate their graduations with us, their engagements with us, their, bridal parties bachelor parties. These are milestone, monumental, moments of these people's lives. They allow us to share with them. And what that does once it leaves your establishment, is the part that I don't think we recognize because we don't see it. It's not tangible what happens in your space. And that transformational opportunity that you talk about in your in your, on your website, that filters out, it's like the pebble in the pond. So you may never know the conversations that they now have with other people because of the experience. They may not talk specifically about the event, but their transformation then filters out into the world, which transforms others. I say this about teachers, my mom, same thing. She didn't realize the impact she made with her students until Facebook came along. Yeah. Because then everybody got to tell her they became a teacher because of her, and they decided not to take their life because of something that she said to them and showed them their value. So those conversations exist outside of what your. Scope of experience can provide, and that's the part that I like to hold onto is the power. The hugs and the kisses and the cries on the shoulders are great in the moment, but what we have to realize is the empowerment that we send out into the community. I've had the same experience with this podcast. I had someone contact me that I hadn't talked to in probably 15 years. I had no idea the struggles that this person was going through. We dated for quite a while. It was my Canadian boyfriend traveling back and forth. He struggled and he shared with me a story and he shared with me the conversation that the on the podcast episode that made him stop and look at something a little bit differently, which changed a trajectory for him. I'm not saying I did that. I opened the space like you do with black and travel. We open the space for miracles, we open the space for engagement, we open the space for community, and if we don't have that, then we're all just a bunch of lonely, sad people who have nowhere to go and to share and to be seen and to be heard. I was sharing about Port of Vallarta when I went there. I was in a tough spot. But the transitional moment was sitting in a drag show with a drag queen called Mama Tits. And she is outrageous and outspoken, and she did this amazing number. She sings, she's got these gorgeous dancers from Mexico. And the last thing she said, and I've shared this multiple times on this podcast, is she said, my loves, do me a favor, surround yourself with people who celebrate you. And that comment changed my life. Yeah. And I realized that there were many people in my life that were not celebrating me, and not in the sense of me being, it's as egotistical and narcissistic, celebrate me, but they weren't celebrating who I am in the world. But that's how I held it. I had to unpack that. I had to sit with that statement for a little bit and go, it isn't about telling me how great I am, it's about telling me that I make a difference, that I'm seen and that I'm heard. And I took that on. Oh yeah. Changed some friendships, right? Got rid of a few people that were a little bit not in that same mode. And what happened was is that I found my happiness again. I found Eric again. I started dating, I started having conversations. I made some new friends. I looked at my career differently, and that's where we find community. And in those moments, it makes that shift, that pivot almost effortless. Not less scary, but effortless, right? So everything we're having is scary. It's the fear that's a whole other podcast in of itself, is the fear and all of that just has us stuck in our own nonsense. You and I could talk forever. I literally just am so happy to have you in my life. I say this with the utmost sincerity. Having people like you out in the world makes this world a better place. I appreciate, and I'm super grateful to you for who you are in the world, for the community that you're creating, for the difference you made for me, ah, and for that difference that it's made for those that I've shared it with. So I wanna thank you for that. I have two final questions for you before we wrap up. Otherwise, we're going to talk until tomorrow. You shared a little bit, but no limitations, pie in the sky. What's next for Nubia Young? Ooh, Eric. I have sat with my accomplishments now over the last, almost a decade of me really just making these transitional, changes for myself and for others. And one of the things that I'm working on right now is visibility. Like I really am trying to do as many interviews, podcasts, articles, because you're right, people do need to know what's happening and who I feel like who I am. Because I do want the support. I do want to collaborate, I do want to work with, and I do want to be seen now in a different tier space. You understand what I'm saying? I do. So I've been working, I hired a publicist, which is not inexpensive at all. Correct. So I'm really pouring into me. I'm pouring now more into my more, right? Like you said, I created the space. It's done. What is done, what's next. I started writing my memoir. So as soon as I'm looking to launch that by hopefully the beginning, the top of 2026. I am starting to curate experiences called The Soft Life. They're called, or EI, which is, Ori is a word from Euroa, which is like head of the head of, the head of your life, you want people to love, if you're going to spend money on random stuff, spend it intentionally on yourself. Like I said, I traveled all these places and it became a blur. I want somebody to show up at a location and not have to touch a damn thing. You understand what I'm saying? At a reasonable budget, like you get what I mean, and just and have this experience that was. Totally curated for your mental health, your physical health, your, just for you to experience the culture, the food, everything in that trip. So when you leave, it will always be something that you remember. So you got a year to plan for my 60th birthday, so let's, I got you. Let's talk offline and we'll hook me up. I got you. That's, but that's what I want. I want now everything that we just talked about, I want that to be more intentional. You get what I'm saying? When I say more, I mean it. So now I'm working on my more, what's now, what's the next level to this legacy that I'm building? What's the next level to this empire that I wanna build, so I'm working on that, and it has all these different, I'm thinking about coming back into podcasting, you should. You should. And thank you should, but I also wanna make sure that I'm devoting the time that I need from me. I've never done pottery. I'm like, I wanna do a pottery class. I've never been to Kabul. I just thought to myself I'm not doing anything Wednesday. Maybe I'll go Wednesday. Just like I want to have that time for me as well, because my mind is always working in work mode. And sometimes we gotta shut that off and just enjoy life. So I also wanna, make sure I just enjoy life you're living your mission, which you even state, is to inspire lasting transformation, right? Yeah. Showing others that no matter where they start, they can rewrite their narrative. I. Absolutely. And you are the true testament to that. And you are the epitome of the just you, you space of being. And like I said, I'm grateful that you are out in the world and we're going to post on our social media and through our podcast link where they can find you and learn more about black and travel. And I encourage everyone to take a look at your work and black and Tulum and to stay in contact and to follow you on Instagram. I am super inspired by you and my world is a better place having you in it. So my final question to you is this, if you could go back to that young Nubia as a child, what would you tell her about her life today? Wow, those questions are always hard, difficult to answer. If I could go back. Talk to the young me. I would tell her that she's beautiful, that she is valued and seen, and to let her know that everything is going to be okay. Just listen to your discernment you're protected, you're watched, you're going to be okay. Why you at me crying? Eric, I told you before we recorded my last question. Sometimes lands like this, but it's important because so many of us look back at our experiences as a child and we all have a journey. We all have a story that allows us the opportunity to go back and to say to that person that the circumstances that we went through as children, as difficult as they were and are that for most, if they can find that space to push through and they can find that conversation to move forward, who they are meant to be will shine. Yeah. And you shine. And the world needs to know who you are. Oprah. Who? I say Nubia. That's right. Say Oprah's about to be auntie. Okay. Because she's on my whole vision. Oh. She's been on for year after year. I'm just BSing you because it is still my dream. I would drive to Montecito tomorrow to stalk her. She's one of my five, I have five top celebrity guests I want on my podcast. And I put it up on my social media wall and it's like her Ellen, Randy Rainbow?'cause I love him. So she's at the top of the list. I'm just blowing smoke.'cause I think you're fabulous. I just wanna have lunch with her. That's it. I wanna sit at her home. I wanna play with her dogs. I wanna talk to her. I wanna have a conversation with her. And I just wanna be in her space and her presence, but. All kidding aside, that's who you are. You're a change maker. She started where she started and changed the world, right? You are doing the same thing. Creating community and creating peace and creating love. And I can't wait till our paths cross again. I will collaborate with you in any way possible. Anytime, anywhere. I'll fly. You guys heard that? You guys heard that? Oh, I'm serious. I'm serious. I said you and Zoe and I together would just be like ridiculous on a panel. But I thank you for your time today. I am excited to have my listeners get to know you better and anytime You're welcome back. Thanks for being here today. Thank you for having me. Have a great day. Bye honey. Alright, everyone, thank you again for joining us on today's episode. I hope our conversation resonated with you like it did me, and I cannot wait to sit down with you all again next week. Remember to subscribe to the Just You Podcast on your favorite platform so you can make sure not to miss a new episode, which drop every Thursday. If you like what you hear, you can easily share the podcast and episode. Directly with your friends and if you would rate us and leave us a review, we'd love to hear from you. You can also follow us on Instagram at just Do you pod as you go out into the world today. Remember to just do you. Alright, talk next week.